Fruit, Failure, and Faithfulness

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.  If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned."  John 15:5-6

 

We are the branches.  We are not the vine or the fruit; we are the branches.  We were designed to grow outward from what we are nourished by inward.  Jesus said, "If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit" (verse 5).  Remaining in Him means spending time in His Word, conversing with Him, and building that intimate, personal relationship He so desires for us to have with Him.  When we are nourished inwardly by His Spirit, it produces good fruit outwardly such as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).  Our "fruit" is the result of what we are abiding in.

I've been abiding in resentment.  I haven't been abiding in my Christ because I've been resentful towards Him.  The fruit I've bore as a result have been selfishness, laziness, loneliness, impatience, anger, greediness, and pride.  I've not been accepting the life He has given me.  I've been hurt by the choices He's made for me because I haven't understood them. 

No wonder I've been feeling lost.  I haven't been attached to the Vine!  So while I've been attempting to love Jesus and follow Him, I've been failing miserably because I've not remained in Him; and as He said, "Apart from me you can do nothing"  (verse 5).  How true those words are!  If I cannot love Jesus the way He ought to be loved (which can only be done if I'm attached to Love Himself), then I cannot do anything.  I will fail at everything. 

Thankfully, He has not given up on me, and He has gently, patiently pursued me with His truths.  I now see how amazing, loving, and generous He is as a Father; and like a good parent, He has made decisions for me that are in my best interests knowing I wouldn't like them and that I would even be resentful towards him. So, so glad He loves me despite my bratty behavior!

Our omniscient God cares and loves us so much that He desires us to remain in Him.  He knows what is best for us and what kind of fruit looks good on us!  He promises us He has plans that give hope and a future for us, not harm (see Jeremiah 29:11).  Harm does come.  It's a part of being in this sinful world and being sinful people, but He hasn't once failed to keep a promise, and He never will fail.  I know now I must wholeheartedly trust Him even if I don't understand and I don't get what I want.  He knows best.  He doesn't want to see us branches being picked up and thrown into the fire.  No, He wants to see us bear much fruit--the kind of fruit that shows we branches can do anything in Christ!

What He did...

"But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners."

--Romans 5:8

As the lights of the church dimmed tonight, the eerie melody of "Were You There?" sunk into my heart like an anchor in deep water.  Darkness slowly enveloped the whole church, and I felt its heaviness upon me.  I have been attending Good Friday services my entire life, and never have I experienced the overwhelming feelings I did tonight.  It was if I was encountering for the first time what Jesus did for me and how much He really loves me, loves you.

I confess I have not really loved Jesus.  Sure, I have said I love Him, and when convenient, I have shown love for Him.  But I have not truly loved Him.  I am ashamed to admit my unauthentic love.  I am ashamed to think that I would have been one of the crowd, during Jesus' trial and death, who spat on Him, who watched Him suffer, who betrayed Him and mocked Him, and left Him; because, in all honesty, I have.  

I have spat on Him when I have knowingly sinned against Him.  I have watched Him suffer when I grumble about my life.  I have betrayed Him when I didn't and don't show or speak love.  I have mocked Him every time I don't get what I want, and I have left Him when I do things my way.  I have not really loved Him; but, Christ Jesus in His goodness and mercy has--deeply, sincerely, selflessly, unconditionally, sacrificially, and wholeheartedly--loved me, and continues to love me...and you.

Thank you, Lord Jesus, King of Kings, for Your ultimate sacrifice and deep love.  "...Sometimes it causes me to tremble, tremble, tremble."  Forgive me, for I do not know what I do.  Remember me in Paradise.  Finish in me what You have begun here tonight.  I resolve to love You better than I have and to commit to You more of my life.  Amen.